Monday, July 25, 2005

"It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like---"

Remember how as a child it seemed like it was 10 years between Christmas's? How that school year just drug on and on until it was finally Summer Vacation, and then that Summer Vacation slipped away and you were back behind that school desk , and, once again, time stood still?

Now here it is a mere 5 months until Christmas and only a week past that until another New Year. And as I personally grow older, I see more wisdom in the words:Time is fleeting. Madness takes its toll." Because it can truely drive you nuts to try to ever recapture lost youth.

When I was 18, I figured I'd probably never make 30. When I was 30, I thought I'd never live past 50. Here I am now at 54 and "still standing". And maybe...just maybe if I'm lucky my gene pattern will follow that of my parents and I'll live into my 80's. "Maybe". My mom and dad never smoked which I figure will shorten my own life perhaps by as much as 10 years. But, you never know.

My grandmother was a chain smoker, never developed cancer, and lived to be 80. My grandfather smoked, and chewed, and drank moonshine whiskey pretty much up until his death at age 87. So I could be trottin' around on this planet for another good 30 years.

Or, I could die tomorrow. That's the chances you take being a mortal. We are such frail creatures; more so than we imagine. And as a youth you think you are immortal. Time sets you straight on that subject eventually.

And when I was a kid I had dreams of being a well-known comic book artist, or a professional oil painter, a movie star or a rock musician. I never achieved any of those goals, but I can't say I'm totally unsatisfied with what I DID achieve. To me, fame and fortune isn't as important as personal satisfaction that I was able to become an adult. To take on adult responcibilities, own my own home, feed and cloth myself and my family and keep a roof over our heads. To have steady employment and to be thought well of by other members of my community, my parents and my employers: those things are important to me.

So maybe I did indeed learn some lessons in this go around in human flesh over the years. I'm sure I still have a lot of lessons to learn before it's over.

P.S.: It's been mentioned that I don't seem to be doing as much posting this year, when in fact, in 2004 I only did a total of 60 posts from May to December. Whereas this year, today's post makes 101 for 2005. So I still have plenty to say! And I do appreciate all who continue to read my semi-regular rantings!


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