"Everytime a Bell Rings I Want to Pull the Wings Off Another Angel"

One of my "pet peeves"... all of this angel statuary you see everywhere these days. Where I work at, we have tons of it, all in its polystone or fiber-optic glory. Gets really sickening seeing it all the time. Perhaps if angels were shown historically accurate it wouldn't be so bad, but it's like 99% always a woman as an angel, and ... correct me if I'm wrong here... but aren't ALL angels "supposed" to be male? I mean, there's not a single account in The Bible (at least not in The King James' version) where an angel has a feminine name.

There's Michael, and Gabriel, and even Satan, but I fail to see a single name like Bertha, or Louise or Sally. Hey! For my own sake, I don't think I'd care actually to see an angel. Most of the time in Biblical text they're killing first borns, destroying cities, and carrying flaming swords. Not to say they haven't been used for some good things as well. The word, Angel, meaning "messenger", has brought tidings of important births, pregnancies, and prophecies as well. They're God's Boys, made by him before the creation of mankind, Protectors of The Seat of God, and His servants. Which, brings us to yet another point...

What makes people think they BECOME angels after death? Nothing says this in The Holy Text. The angels are a SEPERATE creation. Yet movies have filled people with so much BS about them over the years that a lot of people think that when they pass from this mortal coil, they get wings. Wake up and read people; you are supposed to become Spirit, and what in the world would a spirit form need with wings?

Now, what's even sillier than any of this is that we're now seeing figurines of ANIMALS with wings; dogs and cats. All dogs don't go to heaven. And what's even sadder than this is that CHILDREN figurines are being made and sold that are supposed to be angels. Little kids with wings. Uh...doesn't that mean---THEY'RE DEAD?! Dead babies, and people are buying them and calling them "cute". (What is that? Some sort of Alice Cooper Song Cult?)

Alright, I confess. I AM quoting descriptions of angels from Biblical text and I do know that other cultures, in particular Eastern ones, show feminine angels. But I think most of these figures are being purchased by those that don't follow those particular philosophies. I've yet to see a single fibre-optic angel that remotely resembles Shiva.

What I do see are (usually) caucasian women dressed in flowing gowns and surrounded by "little" angels. Most people want to call those Cherubs. And, what IS a cherub? It's actually gotten into our language as a description of a rose-faced child-like angel. What actually IS a cherub? Any of the second order of angels just below the seraphim, and both cherubs and seraphim are WARRIOR angels. How did we ever get an idea that they're cute little winged kids? Blame it on the artists that painted them as such in the 15th. & 16th. (in particular) centuries. The were influenced by Grecian art, and took "Eros" (Cupid), took away his Olypian divinity, and made him a Christian icon.

I guess this all sounds rather trivial a rant, but from the record of what angels are capable of doing, I'm taking no chances in insulting them!